Habit, Not Hack: MMM - Make Meetings Matter
The meeting isn’t the moment to impress - it’s the moment to understand.
No one told me how to “do” meetings in grad school. They just… happened.
I’d show up. Laptop open, smile ready. A little anxious, a little unsure. My advisor or committee member would talk a lot, I’d nod along, maybe scribble a few words. Then I’d leave and immediately forget half of what they said, unsure of what I was supposed to do next.
The worst part? I assumed it was normal.
It wasn’t. It was avoidable.
The Mistake Most New Students Make
Most incoming grad students think showing up to a meeting is the job. That it is enough to be polite, say thank you, and try not to look confused.
But meetings aren’t passive information drops. They’re strategic, high-value opportunities - to clarify direction, build rapport, correct courses, and ask for help. And in academia, meetings are often the only place where unspoken expectations get revealed.
If you treat them like polite check-ins, you’ll miss your chance to grow.
The Habit: MMM - Make Meetings Matter
After fumbling through a few awkward check-ins and leaving one particularly unhelpful “catch-up” meeting on the verge of tears, I built a simple pre- and post-meeting habit I now swear by.
Here’s how it works:
Before the Meeting: Come With a Plan
Ask yourself:
What do I need clarity on?
What decisions or next steps are still fuzzy?
What updates or blockers should I share?
Then, prep these three things:
A 1-line summary of what you’re working on
A short list of 2–3 specific questions
One “what I need from you” ask (feedback, a signature, a resource, etc.)
Even if you don’t use all of it, you’ll walk in grounded, not flailing.
During the Meeting: Be Active, Not Just Present
Take notes in real time (paper, laptop, whatever works)
Ask clarifying questions when something feels vague
Repeat back key takeaways to confirm your understanding:
“Just to make sure I got that right, you’re suggesting I...?”
And if the meeting ends without clear next steps?
Ask for them.
“Just so I’m on track, what should I aim to have done by [date]?”
After the Meeting: Capture & Confirm
Don’t wait 3 days. Within the hour, jot down:
Main takeaways
Action items (with deadlines)
Any lingering questions
It shows you’re proactive. It helps them help you.
And it protects your sanity when three weeks later you can’t remember what was said.
Why This Habit Matters
Because grad school isn’t school - it’s a workplace.
And in the real world, meetings are where expectations, accountability, and opportunities live.
Knowing how to run a meeting (even as a student) teaches you to:
Lead with clarity
Manage power dynamics
Advocate for your own learning
The students who thrive aren’t the ones who nod the most.
They’re the ones who ask questions, follow through, and create clarity where there was confusion.
Try This: Your Next Meeting Checklist
Before your next meeting, try this 3-point habit:
Prep: 1-line summary + 2 questions + 1 ask
During: Take notes + clarify + confirm next steps
After: Summarize key points and send a follow-up if needed
It takes 10 extra minutes. It builds credibility, connection, and calm.
A Reminder for the Overthinkers
You don’t need to perform brilliance in every meeting.
You need to be curious, be prepared, and be engaged.
That’s not a hack.
That’s a habit.
✨ Want to take this habit even further?
Check out the GradLab Compass One-on-one Meeting Form, a printable tool designed to help you show up prepared, ask the right questions, and build a better advisor relationship, one meeting at a time.
🎓 Small pages, big impact. It’s not just a planner - it’s your clarity compass.
Visit our Printables Page →
